me Life and Times of the Fireflies: November 2015

Saturday, 14 November 2015

Rocky turns 12!

I've been feeling very sentimental of late...Perhaps the arrival of the newest addition to our family coinciding with your birthday week has sparked the memory bank...perhaps one never truly forgets. But the memories are there, as vivid as my yesterday.
You have grown so much this past year, and I don't only mean your height; even though you have grown past me! You have grown in confidence and independence too; let go of the proverbial apron strings so to speak. You have grown in so many ways, yet some things feel like they haven't changed at all.  My heart beats with pride just thinking about the individual you are morphing into...but you didn't reach here without a great deal of struggle and sacrifice...Struggles you were too young to remember. Struggles I am glad you don't remember....But I do remember, and it makes me want to draw my protective shield over you ever so tightly.

There are some who would like to take credit for your good manners and gentlemanly charm...your worldly knowledge and wisdom far greater than your years. Gosh! Sometimes I want to take credit for it too! But the truth is that you are a rare and special soul who has brought in me a  much needed calmness, faith and reason (and ever so often give me a good dose of a reality check too with your quirky and witty one liners that has me laughing till my sides hurt!).

You are the joy and laughter of our home. Sensitive (in a way that is different to your siblings), sensible, steadfast...and a little bossy too! A wild card with a gentle heart and a stubborn streak. An off the bat talker, say it as it is (but with a sense of humour) kind of boy. Your bouncing off the walls and crazy exterior housing an internally calm individual. "Big brother" to your big sister, instigator of trouble with your baby brother and dearly loved by ALL who know you.

Your late grandfather always said that you are destined for great things. All I can hope and pray for as you get older and head into Life is that you don't get swallowed by the world or allow the world to change you! The illusion that is this world will always be a temptation...but you will be ok as long as you never forget your roots...never forget what we stand for and never forget who you are!

P.S Please don't exercise your stubborn streak during photo taking times so that next year I can have plenty more pictures to add to my post!!

Love always,
MOM :)

Thursday, 5 November 2015

Embracing the Now

When I was young, all I really wanted was to be a teen! People in their teens seemed so much more put together than those going through adolescence. They possessed an aura of confidence, appeared to have more freedom and fun, seemed more trendier and stylish than me...and in many ways I aspired to be like that.
When I reached my late teens, I fell in love and all I wanted was to marry the guy I love, sail into the sunset and live happily ever after. I wanted to be an adult without really knowing what it entailed.
When I got married, and the kids started to come, and exhaustion took over, the responsibilities kicked in; I couldn't wait till they were a little bigger, a little less of a handful; I prayed for the day where I could have a little time to myself, squeeze in some time for gym, maybe colour my hair in peace! And just as I could see myself emerging from the haze...OOOPS!...Baby number 3!...and I had to go through the process again, albeit a little better prepared.

And when the rough times came rolling in, I fought hard not to lose my footing, to get myself to stable ground. To find the rainbow in the midst of the storm.
And now, my baby is six and the older ones are entering their teens. Life has settled somewhat, and what do you know...suddenly I have something I never had a lot of before. Suddenly I have some Time! And it got me thinking...My whole life so far went by with me wanting to be somewhere else, reaching for the next phase, waiting for tomorrow, waiting for better days... The horizon always seemed a little brighter.
Perhaps the longing robbed me slightly of enjoying the present moment. Perhaps it was a glimmer of hope that made the chaotic days more bearable. But I waited and wondered; and now the tomorrow that always seemed so far away has finally come. Strangely enough, I never quite planned my life beyond this point!

So what is next for me? What does tomorrow look like? Middle age? I don't quite know. But what I do know is that in all my life, I have never been more excited about today and for the first time I am in no rush to reach what's next. I have never before been so aware of the power of the present moment, or more enthusiastic to embrace the Now I'm in; whatever it may bring!

Life is hectic, but my mind has become more calm. Perhaps, in this next stretch of my journey, I get to start focusing on me, find my centre, my balance...and that's a helluva exciting prospect if you think about it :-)

Thanks for reading!